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November 2nd, 2008

Jokes : At the pearly gates

At the pearly gates

At the pearly gates, St. Peter greeted a minister and congressman and gave them their room assignments.

“Pastor, here are the keys to one of our nicest efficiency units. And for you, Mr. Congressman, the keys to our finest penthouse suite.”

“This is unfair!” cried the minister.

“Listen,” St. Peter said, “ministers are a dime a dozen up here, but this is the first congressman we’ve ever seen.”

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At the pearly gates again, a taxi driver and minister are waiting in line. St. Peter consults his list and says to the taxi driver, “Take this silken robe and golden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven.”

St. Peter next greets the minister saying, “Take this cotton robe and wooden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven.”

“Just a minute,” says the minister. “That man was a taxi driver, and he gets a silken robe and golden staff while I get a cotton robe and wooden staff. How can this be?”

“Up here, we work by results,” says St. Peter. “While you preached, people slept; while he drove, people prayed.”

November 2nd, 2008

Jokes : That was a very dull and boring sermon, pastor

very dull and boring sermon

The new minister stood at the church door greeting the members as they left the Sunday moring service. Most of the people were very generous telling the new minister how much they liked his message, except for one man who said, “That was a very dull and boring sermon, pastor.”

A few minutes later, the same man again appeared in line and said, “I don’t think you did much preparation for your message.”

Once again, the man appeared, this time muttering, “You really blew it. You didn’t have a thing to say, pastor.”

Finally, the minister could stand it no longer. He went to one of the deacons and inquired about the man.

“Oh, don’t let that guy bother you,” said the deacon. “He’s a little slow. All he does is go around repeating whatever he hears other people saying.”

November 2nd, 2008

Jokes : Gift Dr. Wayne Dyer got

Dr. Wayne Dyer

Inspirational speaker Dr. Wayne Dyer still remembers the card his kids gave him for his 64th birthday.

The front said, “Inside is a message from God.”

Pleased they finally appreciated his work, he opened it to read, “See you soon!”

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