Click above link to downloadÂ â€œExperiencing God by Alan Ames Part 2â€ slideshowÂ (2.55 MB) Part 02
As I struggle with self and my weaknesses, trying to remain in the light of love, my heart hurts for the love of God. I know it is the struggle within that causes this pain, for as I struggle with my humanity and all its frailties, the light of the Lord seems to fade. As my attention is taken away from that seeking of grace, of love and of the light of God, and onto self, the pain of heart grows as my heart and soul desire only to seek God. Yet my mind draws me back to self and to my inadequacies. It is a constant battle to look beyond self and the world.
Now, looking to the Lord I know He will never let go of me for He loves me. Now, looking to the Lord I know His love never slips by, it just surrounds me. Now, looking to the Lord there is the knowledge that His heart hurts when my heart hurts, for our hearts are one in love.Â Now, looking to the Lord it becomes clear these thoughts of self are just a trap set to lead me from the Lord.Â However, it is obvious now that the Lord will free me from this trap if I so desire. Now my soul cries out, â€˜Yes Lord, I desire it, free me.â€™Â My Lord replies, â€˜In Me you are free, it is only your self that allows you to become a prisoner.â€™
As I look to the Lord, my Master, and reach out to Him as a slave of love, I feel Him taking my entire being into His. I feel a drawing of my humanity into His divinity and a lifting of my soul to the highest heights. As the ecstasy of eternal love envelopes me I know that this is the reason for my existence.
With my soul saturated with Godâ€™s divine love I want only to be with Him forever. I want my soul and every soul to live in this eternal bliss. Now life on earth seems so unimportant yet I know that it is very important for it is through living this earthly life for God that the heavenly life can be found. Now I want to leave the world behind and to live in this state of sanctification forever. Raising my eyes to God I see Him calling me deeper and deeper into His love, calling, â€˜Come to Me not by yourself, but bring others with you.